Month: May 2018

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Glitter Makes It Better?

Peanut has always been a book person, but lately – now that she is an emergent reader herself – she has shown a lot of interest in my bookshelves and the books that I have collected on them.  She knows that she’ll be able to read them all someday, and she’s very excited about the prospect of mowing through Mommy’s library.  She still has a lot to learn about book-collecting, though.

Recently I was reading Brensham Village, the second in the Brensham trilogy of memoirs by John Moore.  Slightly Foxed publishes all three (as of June 1, when they will release the third and final installment) in lovely limited editions, and Brensham Village is bound in a particularly beautiful shade of blue, with sunshine yellow endpapers.  It’s a delight to hold and read, but I noticed that something had happened to the spine of my edition, and this hilarious conversation resulted…

Peanut: I like your little book, Mommy!

Me: Thank you! I like it too.

Peanut: Why are you scraping it?

Me: Well, there’s glitter on the spine. I must have put it down in one of your art projects.

Peanut: So? Glitter is good.

Me: Yes, but I don’t want it to be on my book.

Peanut: WHY NOT?!

Me: Because it doesn’t belong on my book. It’s not supposed to be there.

Peanut: Yeah, but it’s better with the glitter.

How can I argue with that?

(For those who are freaking out right now, I did get the glitter off.  There’s a small spot on the top corner of the spine, but I think I’m the only one who would notice it.  I learned my lesson about not putting my books down on the kitchen counter, too.  Peanut, of course, is incredibly disappointed that I scraped the glitter off of the book and has given me up as a hopeless case.)

Do you think glitter makes everything – even book spines – better?

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It’s Monday! What Are You Reading? (May 28, 2018)

Happy new week to my friends all over the world, and happy Memorial Day to my friends celebrating here at home!  (And thank you, of course, to the brave men and women who serve in the armed forces.)  We’re having a lovely holiday weekend here.  We kicked off our celebrations on Friday when Steve’s mom arrived for a visit – yay!  She lives in Florida and works full-time, so any time we have together is such a treat.  The kids were beyond excited that Grandma was visiting, and we planned a weekend full of fun.  On Friday evening, we drove down to our favorite pizza joint, with which Grandma is well familiar.  We needed to bank lots of energy because Saturday’s plans involved the zoo.  Grandma loves the zoo, and especially ours – because we have pandas, which are her favorite animal.  So anytime Grandma is in town, a zoo visit is mandatory.  This was a good trip – we saw Bei Bei the panda, plus lots of other animals – including some of our new residents: Spike the elephant and Moke the baby gorilla!  (You guys.  Moke was the cutest little guy.  I think I squealed out loud.)  The only disappointment was that the water wasn’t on yet over at the pinnipeds’ splash pad – and it was a hot one, so the kids would have loved to cool off in the waves.  On Saturday evening we rode the trolley down to the waterfront and braved a fancy restaurant with the kiddos – Chart House, Grandma’s request.  We set them up with iPads, the restaurant gave us a table overlooking Nugget’s fire boat and we got to visit with the kids’ babysitter, who is a server at the restaurant.  On Sunday we made the rounds of the playgrounds and fire station before Grandma had to catch her plane back to Florida (sniffle) and we spent the rest of the day chilling at home.  I’m looking forward to a fun family day today – not sure what we’re going to do.  I’d love to squeeze in a hike, but the kids are also clamoring to get out on the river now that the boathouses are open for the season.  So we’ll see.

  

Reading.  Last week was a bit of a slow one in the book department, although I really enjoyed every moment I spent in Brensham and on Apollo 8.  I finished up Brensham Village on Wednesday, and perfect timing too, because the third volume of the trilogy – The Blue Field – just came out in a lovely Slightly Foxed Edition – to match my copies of the first two – and should be en route from England to my doorstep any moment now.  (I can’t wait!)  After reluctantly leaving Brensham behind, I picked up Rocket Men, which has a long wait list at the library, and dug in.  And loved it.  There are a few sub-genres that I can never get enough of, and “dad books about the golden age of space exploration” is one of them.  I finished Rocket Men shortly before crawling into bed last night, but since I can’t be between books for a whole night, I started and read the first few pages of Scenes of Clerical Life, by George Eliot.  I have a small pile of library books demanding my attention – as usual – but couldn’t wait any longer to break into this one.

Watching.  I recorded and watched the kickoff to The Great American Read and it was a lot of fun, even if PBS does think I don’t read enough because I only scored 43/100 on the “how many have you read?” quiz.  I’m definitely inspired to seek out some of the ones I haven’t yet gotten around to (although not all – 50 Shades of Grey is not going to be my speed, no matter what) and I am pretty impressed with the variety of the choices.

Listening.  I’m sort of everywhere, as usual.  Some podcasts, although nothing stands out as particularly memorable, and some music – mostly my normal Decemberists/Offa Rex/showtunes circuit – oh, with a little Rusted Root thrown in there to make me feel like it’s the 1990s again and I’m back at Camp Little Notch dancing on the dock with the rest of the Mariners.  Send me on my way…

Blogging.  I have a bookish week ahead for you – a funny conversation I had with Peanut on Wednesday, and my May reading round-up on Friday.  Do check in with me then!

Loving.  I’m always going on and on about Instagram, I know, but it’s my favorite social media channel and it gives me such joy.  One of the most consistently delightful things on Instagram is Angela Kinsey’s stories.  I have been a fan of Angela’s since her days on the office – don’t @ me, but buttoned-up accountant Angela Martin was my favorite character – and while Kinsey couldn’t be more different from her character, I adore her too.  The adventures of Angela and the Vending Machine Jacket are not to be missed, and the story she posted when she was accidentally looped into a group message exchange with a bachelorette party was comedy gold.  Recently she posted a picture of her daughter dressed in unicorn pajamas, hands clasped and an expression of pure delight on her little face as she took in a new baby doll, and then recorded a story about how emotional it made her to see her daughter’s innocent joy in that moment.  It was a lovely, lovely story and a good reminder to appreciate that sweet sense of wonder before they grow up.

Asking.  What are you reading this week?

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All Abloom At Mount Vernon

Last weekend we toddled down to Mount Vernon, where we often find ourselves, and spring was springing all over the place.  The ground was an inch deep in mud, unsurprisingly – since it had been raining for days on end.  But more to the point, the upper garden was a riot of color and life.

The gorgeousness had to be seen to be believed.

Happy Friday, friends!  I hope you enjoyed these, and I hope you have lovely weekends ahead.

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Cobblestones Over Concrete: A Manifesto

I believe…

Pie is better than cake (and Grandma’s apple pie tops all).

Tea is better than coffee.

Sailboats are better than party boats.

Independence Day is the best holiday of all (yes, even better than Christmas – give me sparklers over twinkle lights).

Flip-flops are better than black pumps.

Books are better than television.

Wine is better than beer.

A woodstove (or fireplace, or campfire) is better than a thermostat.

Summer is better than winter, and fall is best of all.

Thunderstorms are better than mist.

Raspberries are better than strawberries are better than blueberries.

But any fruit dessert is better than chocolate.

Cobblestones are better than concrete.

Beach days are better than snow days (but both have their place).

What are your opinions?

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It’s Monday! What Are You Reading? (May 21, 2018)

Happy new week, and happy birthday (belated – it was yesterday) to my dad!  We had a nice weekend, even if I did get a case of the Sunday Scaries after a few work emails started to trickle in around lunchtime on Sunday.  Backing up a bit, I got an early-ish start to the weekend by working from home on Friday – it was “Grandparents and Special Friends Day” at Peanut’s school.  Aunt Rebecca served as Peanut’s guest this year and Peanut felt so special having her there.  Steve and I crashed the party – actually, there were a lot of parents there, since part of the festivities included the spring concert, which was adorable.  We took Peanut home for the afternoon and I squeezed in a few hours of work and a run to Whole Foods to pick up ingredients for raspberry scones to take to our ROYAL WEDDING VIEWING PARTY on Saturday.  (All caps totally required!)  My plan had been to just roll out of bed and watch at home, but late last week the plans changed when Peanut’s BFF’s mom (got all that?) texted to ask if we wanted to have a mother-daughter viewing party.  UM, YES, we are here for that!  The girls actually didn’t watch much, but the moms had the.best.time.ever eating scones and chocolate croissants on the couch, googling wedding guests, and gossiping about the royal family.  There is really nothing like girlfriend time.  The rest of Saturday was fairly quiet – it was rainy and gross for most of the day, and when I took Nugget out to work off his energy after the deluge finally stopped, I immediately regretted my decision because he leapt into a mud puddle and started rolling around like a piglet.  Whoops.  Sunday dawned bright and sunny, and we spent it as we so often do – hiking around Mount Vernon in the morning, and then making the firehouse-library-playground circuit after naps.  I had a million things to do (laundry, work on a personal project I’m trying to wrap up, find a CSA, vacation plan…) but instead I snuggled in Nugget’s rocking chair, read my book and caught up on royal wedding fashion blog posts.  (Best line of the coverage was the Fug Girls’ observation: “Fergie’s gotta Ferg.”)  I’m not even sorry.

  

Reading.  It was a good reading week.  I finally got to Sing, Unburied, Sing, and I can definitely see what the hype was about.  It was not a comfortable reading experience, but good to push the envelope now and then and I’m very glad I read it.  I was back in my comfort zone with the new Maisie Dobbs, and this was definitely a good installment.  I was reading until late Friday night in order to make the return deadline for the new Maisie, but I made it.  Now with a tiny bit of breathing room, I’ve turned back to my own shelf and am reading Brensham Village, the second book in the Brensham Trilogy – in preparation for my copy of the third and final book’s arrival on my doorstep in the next few weeks.  Can’t wait!  I’m about halfway through Brensham Village and am liking it even more than I liked the first installment, Portrait of Elmbury.

Watching.  The royal wedding, of course!  What else?  It was so much fun to watch with a girlfriend who was just as excited and into it as I was – and we both loved every moment.  Meghan’s dress, Harry’s gazing, the gospel choir, the cellist, the flowers, all the romantic moments, the KISSING!  Poor Kate looked like she was going to fall asleep (by my calculations, she’s now in the stage where newborn adrenaline has worn off and exhaustion is hitting hard…) but William kept his eyes open better than he did on Anzac Day, probably because he got to stand up the whole time.  And oh, my word, little Charlotte and her royal waving!  Eeeeeks, I just loved it all.

Listening.  It seems we are all required to take a stand on this, so: Team Yanny.  (Steve is the lone member of Team Laurel in the house, and he’s taking it really hard.)

Laughing.  So, we have a pretty hotly contested mayoral election coming up in a few weeks, and Washingtonian did a big article on it.  The election itself isn’t particularly funny, but some of the quips in the article were spot-on, particularly: “There’s a part of Fairfax that calls itself Alexandria, and nobody can do anything about it.  The only towns we would plausibly beat in a war are Falls Church and Takoma Park.”  I think I spat coffee across the office when I read that, because it is hilariously true.  Well – actually, I don’t know how much I like ALX’s chances in a war with Falls Church.  I do think we’d beat Takoma, though.  (In all seriousness, for the first time in my voting life I am truly undecided.  I do plan to vote but I have no idea who to vote for.  And it’s not ignorance of the issues – I’m decently informed about local politics and the two candidates have such different, but equally valid, visions for our town; I just can’t decide who should get my vote.)

Moving.  The usual – some hiking, some kid-wrangling, some stairs at work.  Nothing special or fun.  I miss running – life has been so busy and I haven’t been able to squeeze it in.  I know that sounds like an excuse, but it’s not.  I swear it’s not.

Blogging.  I flaked on the promised post about my controversial opinions, so how about this Wednesday instead?  And on Friday, for those of you who don’t become furious and quit my blog forever after reading about how I feel about pie and Independence Day, I will have some Mount Vernon flower pictures to share with you and soothe any ruffled feathers.

Loving.  I have been starry-eyed all weekend over the obvious love and joy that the new Duke and Duchess of Sussex have in one another.  From the “You look amazing.  I’m so lucky.” to all the hand-holding and kissing – oh, my word.  In these dark days of one horrific news story after another, it was such a relief to check out of that and just be happy and truly enjoy something for a few hours.  I am still coming down from the royal wedding euphoria and am so excited to see where life takes Harry and Meghan.  (And I hope the royal family is nice to her.)

Asking.  What are you reading this week?

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Squirrelbait 2018: Come and Get It

It’s that time again!  My next-door neighbor has been puttering around her garden (flowers, not herbs/veggies) for weeks now, but I’ve been so overwhelmed at work that I haven’t had time, and we had a weirdly extended winter anyway.  But it was time, and Mother’s Day was dreary and grey – just the right weather for a trip to the garden center and some planting between bands of rain.

We went back to an old favorite – Holly, Woods and Vines on Richmond Highway; we used to live less than two minutes from its distinctive palm-festooned entrance and it was fun, if a little bittersweet, to be back in our old neighborhood.  The kids immediately started stomping in the puddles, and I congratulated myself on making sure they had their wellies on.

They also found koi for sale and were completely delighted with their discovery.  Unfortunately, we don’t exactly have room for a koi pond on our little urban patio.  Sorry, kids!

 

Then they took off running, so Steve chased after them while I filled up the little wagon.  I was a little bit sad that we didn’t get to pick out plants together, but they were both being so rambunctious that it was impossible.  Maybe next year.

I paid for the plants and restocked our birdseed, then it was home to dig in the dirt!  The kids were filthy and needed baths, but since we had a break in the rain I suggested we get our gardening done before cleaning them up.  They helped me clean out and prep the pots and we were ready to plant.  (And yes, our neighbors took their fence down.  They’re planning to put a new fence up at some point.  In the meantime, the kids are enjoying having their outdoor play space doubled.)

With two digging experts to assist, I had everything potted in no time.  We’re doing tomatoes and herbs again, and I have two pots of Rapunzel cherry tomatoes (Peanut loves the name, and I had success with that varietal last year), one pot of Sweet 100, and a few pots of herbs including rosemary, chives, strawberry mint and basil.  Next weekend I’ll probably fill up the rest of the herb pots via the farmers’ market; I’m thinking of thyme and another peppermint, at least.

Time to water!

Nothing feels as good as garden soil on your hands.

I’ll bet you’re wondering about the title of this post, huh?  Yes, we have named this year’s garden “Squirrelbait,” and thank you for asking.  The squirrels have been particularly brazen and destructive lately.  Peanut came home with a bean plant in a cup and we planted it a couple of weeks ago, and it took the squirrels less than 24 hours to dig it up and carry it off.  The nerve!  They’ve also destroyed several of our neighbors’ flowerpots.  I don’t know if it’s the lack of fence or something in the water or what, but they’re insane this year.  So we’ll just be grateful if they leave us some tomatoes to enjoy over the course of the summer.  Unless anyone has a tried-and-true squirrel repellant trick (and preferably not one involving cayenne pepper) to share?

Are you planting a garden this year?  Are your squirrels also pure evil?

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12 Months of Trails: Mason Neck State Park in May, 2018

In my family, anytime we have an occasion to celebrate – a birthday, milestone, just a nice-weather day – we hike.  That’s just what we do!  So naturally, when Steve asked me how I wanted to celebrate Mother’s Day, I said that I wanted to hike – somewhere with water views, not too far away, but far enough to feel like I’d gotten away from it all.  My favorite Virginia state park checks all of those boxes and then some, so that’s where we headed – Mason Neck State Park.

The kids were hoping to spot some turtles, and so was I!  Our first stop was our usual haunt – the Bay View Trail.  But it was overrun with bees (oops!) so we beat a hasty retreat and headed for the Beach Trail instead.  Much better.

WE ARE READY FOR YOU, TURTLES.

I love the boardwalk opening up from under an archway of green.  It’s so nice to see leaves again!  What was the deal with that winter?  And hard to believe that just about a month ago, we were hiking here with Rebecca and Brandy and we were all bundled up in winter coats and hats.

Winter?  What is winter?  It was sunny, gorgeous, and hot overlooking the little beach.  I loved it.

There you are, turtles!

As I mentioned on Monday, I had a mom milestone – the first time I told off a kid that wasn’t my own.  Some boys were shooting a nerf gun at the turtles and when one of them gleefully shouted “If that turtle comes back I’m going to shoot it!” I turned to him and snapped “You’d just better not.”  And – wow.  Apparently I scare some kids.  Just not my own kids.

Back up to the picnic area and play fields, we stopped by the birdhouses to check out the feathered friends.  There were two absolutely stunning goldfinches eating out of one of the feeders, but sadly – no pictures.  They were shy.  But this luminescent blue-feathered bird was happy to show off.

(Anyone know what kind of bird this is?  Amal?)

The park was hopping, because there was some kind of festival going on – lots of tents featuring different area wildlife refuges and outdoor suppliers – including REI!  And there was a demonstration tent where a volunteer was leading a lecture on birds of prey, featuring some very special guests.  Peanut loves raptors and owls and she was transfixed.  Nugget made it through about ten minutes before I had to bustle him off to the playground, but Peanut (and Steve) stayed to the bitter end of the educational program, and Peanut declared that she wants to be a falconer when she grows up.  (Who doesn’t?)

Happy Mother’s Day to all of my friends!  I hope that you had a lovely day celebrating the women in your life, and that someone celebrated you, too – we all nurture someone, after all.  

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It’s Monday! What Are You Reading? (May 14, 2018)

Hello, and Happy Mother’s Day (belated) to all of my friends!  To those of you who are moms (biological, adoptive, foster, grand, fur, mentoring, expecting and any I’ve missed) I hope you had a lovely day and felt celebrated for all of the hard work you do and the love with which you do it.  I had a lovely weekend and felt very celebrated by my little crew.  On Saturday, we were greeted with bright sunshine, blue skies, and temps that felt like the low 90s – YES.  (I know that’s too hot for some, but not for me.  I have never met a summer day that was too hot, and I live in a swamp.)  We kicked off the weekend of celebration in the best way we know how – with a hike.  As it was Mother’s Day weekend, I got to choose the park (within reason – Joshua Tree National Park was rejected despite requests from both Nugget and me; something about choosing a hike within driving distance?).  Anyway, we went to my favorite Virginia State Park – Mason Neck.  I love that park so much; I could hike there every day and not get tired of it.  Saturday was a particularly busy day; there was some sort of festival going on and there was something for everyone – birds of prey (for Peanut), fire trucks (for Nugget) and an REI tent (for the parents).  We wandered the trails, spotted turtles, I experienced a new mom milestone (the first time I told off a kid that wasn’t mine – he was shooting a nerf gun at the turtles and needed a dressing down) and Peanut learned a bunch of facts about falcons.  Pictures on Wednesday.  On Sunday, I woke up early and squeezed in an hour or so of work before the boys and the girl came downstairs bearing homemade cards and the most beautiful necklace – the very first shell Nugget ever picked up off the beach and gave to me, which Steve had dipped in gold and turned into a gorgeous and meaningful pendant for me.  (Sorry, ladies, he’s taken.)  We spent the morning at the garden center, where the kids stomped in puddles and harassed the koi and I picked out cherry tomato and herb plants, then we went home and planted our summer garden – a bit later than last year, when we jumped the gun and planted in late March.  I took a glorious nap while the kids snoozed the afternoon away, and woke up feeling a bit more human after 70-hour workweek.  We ended the weekend curled up on the couch, re-watching The Crown and eating takeaway from my favorite local seafood joint, Hank’s Oyster Bar.  I felt very loved and celebrated indeed.

Reading.  Surprisingly good reading week, given that I worked 70 hours (no kidding; it was actually probably more, as I had 68 and change entered on my time sheets).  On Monday I finished Second Class Citizen, which was well-written but had a really unsatisfactory ending, and was also suffering from the syndrome of being under a library deadline and therefore not quite what I was most hankering for at the time.  The same day, I finally finished Sailing Alone Around the Room, a collection of poems by Billy Collins.  I didn’t love it.  More when I recap my month’s reading, but suffice it to say – I’m picky abut poetry and I don’t love the quotidian as a topic for single poems, let alone entire anthologies of poems.  Give me Tennyson, please.  The rest of the week, up to Saturday night, I spent with The Last Watchman of Old Cairo, which was as lush and gorgeous and spellbinding as the author’s previous (debut) novel The Oracle of Stamboul.  (I highly recommend them both, but I think The Last Watchman is probably the stronger of the two.)  It was the kind of book that I would open when I got on the train in the morning, sink into, and then not realize where or who I was until I had to bolt out of the train door eight stops later – it’s that engrossing.  Ended the weekend with Sing, Unburied, Sing, but I’ve just started it, so no coherent thoughts yet.  Hoping for a slightly quieter week with more reading time.

Watching.  We’ve fallen back into the first season of The Crown, as noted above, just sort of randomly but we’ve been completely sucked back in.  On Sunday evening we watched the “Act of God” episode, about the great London fog, and were quite literally weeping with laughter when the characters started talking about Churchill’s behavior demonstrating his incapacity to lead.  I said “Incapacity?  Lemme tell y’all how we do incapacity to govern in Murica!” and Steve added “HOLD MY BEER!”  [Insert cry-laugh and sobbing emojis here.]

Listening.  Just random podcasts; nothing is really sticking out as particularly memorable.  In music news, both of my kids are completely obsessed with China Anne McClain’s Calling all the Monsters and I think we listened to it about thirty times this weekend.  It is now in my head forever.  Get your body shakin’, wishing you would just awaken.  Tonight all the monsters gonna dance, comin’ to get ya.  I can’t even sing it out loud to get it out of my head, because they’ll want to watch the video (again) and embed it even deeper into my brain.  (It is catchy.)

Moving.  Hardly at all, because – see above, 70-hour workweek.  I did get in about 13,500 steps on Saturday between hiking and two playgrounds, so that’s something.

Blogging.  May hike coming for you on Wednesday, and breaking ground on the 2018 garden, which has been affectionately nicknamed “Squirrelbait,” on Friday.  Check in with me then!

Loving.  I have to apologize, because this might be The Most Southern Lady Thing I’ve Ever Written Here, but I’m sort of obsessed with Princess Eugenie’s Instagram.  (There, I said it.)  It’s half promoting women and great causes, and half pictures of herself and her family dressed in hilariously outlandish outfits in the 1990s.  The York sisters in their Easter bonnets was a particular classic, but Fergie’s fabulously loud blouse and acid-washed jeans at what appears to be the fair, coupled with the Bea and Eugenie’s denim dresses might just take the cake.  I literally cannot get enough.

Asking.  What are you reading this week?

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You Have No Compassion For My Poor Nerves: Austenite Mothers

The business of her life was to get her daughters married; its solace was visiting and news.

Recently, my friend Susan and I were discussing the subject of mothers in Jane Austen.  I’m not sure how the particular topic of mothers came up, since our friendship is one extended conversation about all things Janeite – but it may have been that we both (independently) finished re-reading Northanger Abbey recently.

At some point in the conversation, I mused that I had been trying to suss out a theme in Austen’s portrayal of mothers.  It seemed a bit of a stretch, but the closest thing that I could find to a common thread was that none of Austen’s heroines can entirely rely upon their mothers for wisdom or guidance.  Some don’t have mothers in their lives at all; others have mothers somewhere in the deep background, but none of them are overly helpful to our heroines.  Witness:

  • Anne Elliot‘s mother is deceased.  She has a surrogate in Lady Russell, but that good lady’s advice isn’t always particularly good, since it was her meddling that drove Anne and Captain Wentworth apart originally; one wonders if, had Lady Elliot been living, Anne would have had her happily-ever-after when she first fell in love with Wentworth, instead of having to wait eight years.
  • Emma Woodhouse‘s mother is also deceased.  The closest to a mother that Emma comes is “poor Miss Taylor” – her governess, who becomes “poor Mrs Weston” and departs the house in the beginning of the book.  Mrs Weston plays a role in bringing Frank Churchill to Hartfield and is otherwise distracted by marriage and pregnancy – hardly available to guide Emma through her growing pains.
  • Fanny Price lives apart from her mother, under the arch eye of two unpleasant aunts.  Even from afar, Fanny can’t rely on her mother – worn down by poverty and a drunken husband, she’s just trying to get through the days.
  • Elinor and Marianne Dashwood have a living mother in the same household, and she’s generally okay, but not a particularly solid source of relationship advice – she thinks Willoughby is a delightful young man, after all.  (Which makes sense, because she’s basically Marianne, twenty years on.)  And she fails to recognize the distress that Elinor is in for most of the novel.  I may be a bit hard on Mrs Dashwood, but Elinor Dashwood is one of my favorite Austen heroines, and every time I read Sense and Sensibility I am frustrated anew at Mrs Dashwood’s enabling of Marianne’s diva tendencies and her demand that Elinor enable them too.
  • Catherine Morland has probably the best (most decent, non-embarrassing) mother in the Austen landscape, but even bustling and kindly Mrs Morland isn’t much help to her daughter – she is too distracted by the other members of her brood and, likely, by the demands of being a rector’s wife.  Catherine spends most of the book out of her parents’ presence – first in Bath with the Allens and then at Northanger Abbey, seat of the Tilney family – and the Morland parents are a benign offstage presence, mostly forgotten, for the bulk of the book.
  • Elizabeth Bennet, I saved for last, because I have feelings about Mrs Bennet.  She’s clearly meant for a comic character in the book (“You have no compassion for my poor nerves!”) and Jane slyly pokes fun at her repeatedly – but I’ll champion her.  Mrs Bennet is an excellent mother.  She had a hard job to do with very high stakes – marry off five daughters (five!) to ensure their comfort once their parents are no longer living.  (Austen is very clear about what happens to women who do not marry in her universe.  They become Miss Bates, ridiculed by her community and very probably at least a little bit hungry.)  Mrs Bennet has no choice – she has to marry those girls off, or they could legitimately end up miserably poor, and she has to do it without any help from their father, who it’s clear mismanaged their estate and takes no interest in his daughters’ future comfort.  And she succeeds – boy, oh boy, does she succeed.  Jane married to Bingley (rich); Lydia to Wickham (hey, she’s out of the house at least); and Lizzy married to Darcy (super rich, owner of a great estate, descended from aristocracy).  Kitty is “much improved” by spending more time with Lizzy and Jane after their marriages and makes a good match with a clergyman near Pemberley, and we are told that even Mary finds a man, eventually.  Mrs Bennet may be ridiculous, but you can’t argue with the fact that she has one job to do, and it’s a difficult job with a high cost for any failure – and she is wildly successful.  I’d make the case that Mrs Bennet is a far better parent than laissez-faire Mr Bennet (as much as we love his dry quips), that she’s much savvier than she gets credit for, and that her daughters’ comfort in later life owes much more to her than to their father.  Shouts to Mrs Bennet!

This does seem to be the common thread.  All of the heroines have to muddle through their young womanhood without much – or any – help from their mamas.  Some have sisters they can rely on (Jane Bennet is the best example, but Elinor Dashwood is a stand-up sister too and seems to take great comfort in her close relationship with Marianne, for some reason).  Others have female role models that they look to with varying degrees of success – Mrs Weston, Mrs Allen, and Lady Russell come to mind.  And poor Fanny Price just has to go it alone.  I wonder what that says about Austen’s view of mothers in general.  Superfluous?  Perhaps I’m biased – being a mom to a daughter – but I believe that a constant, steady, reliable mother figure would have smoothed the path of any of the Austen heroines.  Maybe that’s why all the mothers are in the background, if they’re there at all – it makes better reading when the heroine has to struggle, after all.

Who do you think is the best Austenite mother?  Would Lady Elliot have encouraged Anne to marry Wentworth to begin with?  And how underrated is Mrs Bennet?

Happy Mother’s Day to all my friends!  I hope you have a lovely day celebrating with the moms in your life.

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It’s Monday! What Are You Reading? (May 7, 2018)

Ughhhhhhhh I cannot, I just cannot, deal today.  This is going to be one of those kinds of blog posts, because I am in a rotten mood.  I have been dreading this week, because I’m swamped with work and also running around (two speaking engagements and an all-afternoon meeting) the first half of the week, so I have no idea when I am going to get everything else done.  I put in time on both Saturday and Sunday, but I’m still totally behind the curve and just burnt. out.  Plus, it was kind of a dreary weekend, but not actually raining – so the weather was both good and bad, which – pick a lane, weather!  It was supposed to rain all weekend, and I was already mad about that (because of course it’s gorgeous all week long when I’m stuck in an office) but at the same time, I figured the blah weather was going to be good for work, at least.  Well – the rain forecast didn’t materialize, which meant I got less work done (and I was crankier when I was working) but at least we were able to squeeze in a hike on Saturday morning – staying on track in the 52 Hike Challenge, if not chipping away at the backlog.  We hiked Potomac Overlook Regional Park – a new-to-us trail that was a lot tougher than advertised.  There were something like ten slippery stream crossings, logs to climb over and limbs to duck under, lots of elevation change, and we were both schlepping about 40 pounds of child carriers.  Definitely not the “easy to moderate” trail that our local hiking guide promised, but at least it was good preparation for hiking in the Adirondacks this summer.  On Sunday we just wandered around the neighborhood, which was nice – and then it was back to the computer for me.  Wish me luck this week, friends.  I have fun plans for next weekend (weather permitting) but I have to get through the week first.

  

Reading.  This week has felt like a bit of a rut.  I finished Northanger Abbey on Monday, which is one of my favorite books – so that part was good.  But pressing library deadlines pushed me into the “reading feels like work” territory and as a result, I didn’t have much fun with the rest of the week.  The Untelling was beautifully written but I just couldn’t feel much sympathy for the main character, who made terrible choice after terrible choice.  Second Class Citizen, similarly, is beautifully written – I can tell why it’s a classic – but it’s suffering from not being exactly what I want to read in this moment.  I’m just in a funk, y’all.  I’ll be out of it by next weekend, I’m sure.

Watching.  I don’t think I’ve watched anything this week.  Certainly nothing is sticking in my memory.  Steve has been turning on the TV only for video games, and the kids are on an iPad diet so I’m not even watching Miles From Tomorrowland over their shoulders.  It’s sort of refreshing.

Listening.  All over the place, again.  Some music (Offa Rex, mostly, this week) and some podcasts.  I’m catching up on back episodes of parenting and lifestyle podcasts, mainly because I feel like I should.  I’m usually up-to-date on book podcasts – although I am saving season 2 of Annotated for a rainy day – but I often leave podcasts on other topics languishing.  The highlight of the week was a back episode of Sorta Awesome on celebrating the everyday.  I’ve listened to several people’s fair shares of Sorta Awesome at this point, and I think I can safely say that the episodes in which Kelly Gordon co-hosts are my favorites.

Planning.  I am so overwhelmed with work and life stuff right now that it feels like the only way to escape it is by diving headfirst into summer vacation planning, so that’s what I’m doing.  Lodging is booked, and now it’s time to do my favorite part – plot our activities.  I’m a list-making, canoe-rental-finding, hike-scheming machine.

Blogging.  This should be a fun week.  On Wednesday, I will get controversial with some opinions about things like pie, sidewalks, and vegetables – this is hard-hitting stuff, folks.  (Not really.  Unless you think Christmas is better than the Fourth of July, in which case you are wrong.)  And on Friday I have a fun pre-Mother’s Day post about motherhood in Austen novels, so check in with me then.

Pinning.  Big news!  I’m back on Pinterest after an eleven-month hiatus.  I had to create a new account because Pinterest put my old account in “safe mode” and I couldn’t reset it, since it was associated with an email address I no longer have.  But I’ve moved most of my pins over to my new account, and created a bunch more boards just for fun.  I’ve been having the best time going pin-crazy, so if you’re a pinner, come find me!

Loving.  I am so excited that The Yellow Note recently featured my hometown!  I’m a huge fan of Briana’s photography on Instagram – her feed is such a breath of fresh air.  It was super fun to see my favorite stomping grounds come to life through her gorgeous photos on the blog, and to hear about the delicious food and fun sightseeing she enjoyed during her short stay in town – which included stops at some of my favorite haunts.

Asking.  What are you reading this week?