Well, here we are again at the start of a new year.  2017 sure was a doozy, and while I am certainly hoping for better things for our country and the world in this coming year, it’s hard to be optimistic.  But from a personal perspective, I am optimistic.  I am hopeful for good things for me and for my family in 2018.  This is going to be a big year for us – Nugget will start preschool (sniff) and Peanut will be in kindergarten (double sniff!) and Steve and I will, I hope, continue to grow professionally, personally, and in our marriage.  I’m sure there will be travel, adventures closer to home, and lots of time with family and friends.  And for me individually, there are a few things I would like to do, and this year, I have found it helpful to break the goals into categories (as I sometimes do).

Outdoors/Fitness

• Another 12 Month Hiking Project.  There are still plenty of parks and trails around here to explore, and I want to experience them all.  In Buffalo, I ran out of fresh hikes to do and was only able to do this once.  Back in northern Virginia, we have a wealth of hiking opportunities – hurray!
• Complete the 52 Hike Challenge!  An Instagram friend did this last year, and I found it completely inspiring, so I signed up for 2018.  I have no illusions that this is going to be an easy goal to achieve, but I will feel incredibly proud if I do finish the challenge.
• Get into a workout routine that I can sustain with my current schedule and pace of life, and that makes room for all of the things that I enjoy most – running, yoga, barre3 and hiking.  I think I’m fairly close to figuring this one out, and I’d love to reap the benefits of it all year long.

Relationships

• Be a “yes mom.”  I’d like to be someone who mostly says yes to things and doesn’t say no without good reason.  I have to stand by my decisions either way and it’s nicer to go through life saying yes to the kids than saying no to them.  (Within reason, of course.)
• Related: try to chill out overall.  I tend to be a high-stress person and I think that mostly, I am pretty good at not bringing stress home and taking it out on my family.  But I can always do better at this.  I’d like to end 2018 feeling like we created a lot of happy memories as a family, and not feeling like I was an anxious and cranky person all the time.
• Go on dates!  In 2017 Steve and I started focusing on getting out for more date nights now that the kids are older (and our nanny told us she was looking for extra babysitting opportunities) and I want to keep that rolling.  We do miss the little rugrats when we are out and about without them, but having time for the two of us is important, too.

Personal/Self-Care

• Pack my lunches.  I got out of the habit of packing lunches in Buffalo, and never quite got back in the habit in D.C.  Since it’s expensive to buy lunch, this is definitely something that I want to change as soon as possible.
• Step away from the screen.  I am already pretty good at this – I don’t watch TV much – but I can get lost in Twitter and Facebook.  Instead of scrolling mindlessly, I’d like to use that time for reading, doing projects, moving, or being productive around the house.
• Explore natural healing and wellness options.  There are some areas of my life (hydration, for instance) where I feel like I am on a roll, but in other areas, I need help.  I would love to find some natural remedies that could help me improve my digestive health and also my focus, attention, and calm.  I think these things are tied to one another, at least a little bit, and I’d like to delve into essential oils, supplements, movement and dietary changes so that I can feel my best, both emotionally and physically, this year.

Reading

• Read fewer books.  Yes, you read that right!  In a normal year, I seem to clock in around 100 books no matter what I do – but this year, I want to read 52.  I’ll be happy to read more than that, of course, but I want to create some space for another goal…
• Check off some of the classics on my TBR.  I have a lot of Trollope, Gaskell, Dickens and others on my shelves, and they are calling my name.  But I want to take it slow and give them the attention they deserve – plus they are long, and often written in a different style than the more modern books I can crush in a day – hence the goal to read fewer books.
• Continue to make diverse reading a priority.  Diversity is something that is important to me and I find that my reading list is overwhelmingly white unless I pay it specific attention.  So for the past few years I have paid attention and exceeded my goal of 33% “diverse” authors (writers of color, LGBTQ+, underrepresented religious groups, etc.).  I’d like to continue paying attention and making the effort to seek out writers of color and LGBTQ+ authors in 2018, although I am not going to set a particular number or percentage goal this year.

One Word

What word should guide me through 2018?  This is a question that has been nagging at me since last November, and it took a long time to find something.  There are quite a few words that I’ve considered, but have really jumped out as the right word for this year.

Breathe.  Be.  Calm.  Focus.  Soft.  Thrive.  Attention.

I briefly considered the word “leap.”  I’ve been needing to make a change in an area of my life (more on this if it happens) and have struggled with taking control and setting the steps in motion to address a situation that is not quite working for me.  I took a big step forward and was met with a positive reception, which scared me – a very silly thing, since I’m not committed to anything yet, and getting a good reaction should not be a frightening thing.  The thought occurred to me that “I’m just going to have to leap,” and then I considered that leap might be a good word for 2018.  But on reflection, it doesn’t feel quite right, because I might not leap.  I might make a smaller change or no change at all.  I simply haven’t decided yet, and I am still giving myself space for consideration.

Anyway, with leap out of the question, I found I kept coming back to the same word.  I’ve been listening on repeat to a Forlorn Strangers song, “Down in the Trenches,” the chorus of which goes:

When the thunder’s rolling in
And your heart is feeling thin,
Shed off your old skin
And begin, and begin, and begin.

It’s funny.  Usually a word either strikes me like a bolt from the blue (see: home) or whispers gently in my ear that the moment is right (see: gather).  This time, neither of those things happened, and I was a bit at a loss, until I realized that the word begin was making a quiet drumbeat in the background of my days.  Waiting, maybe, for me to come around to it rather than the other way.

I have been hoping that 2018 would be a year of new beginnings.  Beginning habits that will carry me through to a better life; beginning new projects and seeking out new trailheads; beginning the post-baby phase of our parenting lives as a family with (relatively) older children; beginning new opportunities that will help me to grow professionally and personally and in my community.  I feel as though I am standing at about a dozen starting lines.  More than that, I am craving new beginnings, more so even than I do on a typical New Year’s.  In 2018, it’s more important to me than ever to slough off old habits and selves and to begin anew.

So – I think that’s it.  My word for 2018 will be begin.  It’s been elusive up to this point, so I’m a little more hesitant to adopt it than I am when a word chooses me.  But it feels like the right word for starting fresh, and for a year that I hope will bring a few changes and adjustments and some new things.

Have you chosen a word for 2018?  What are your goals for the year?