With Nugget’s impending arrival creeping up on me, I’ve been reading even more parenting articles than usual.  (This whole thing about parents having CPS called on them for giving their kids a little bit of independence makes my blood boil.)  Some of the articles I’m reading are more of your run-of-the-mill “advice for new moms” – not that I consider myself a “new mom” at this point.  But a refresher never hurt, right?

A few weeks ago a friend posted an article on Facebook sharing some of that “advice” for those in the new mommy trenches.  I can’t even find the article anymore.  Most of it was pretty standard stuff.  Don’t sweat the small stuff.  Don’t freak out about every moment being fleeting; read a magazine article if you want.  Don’t let anyone make you feel guilty for your parenting choices.  But there was one piece of advice that made me do a double take… and then see red.

The article advised that moms DON’T read to their babies and young children.

Wait… WHAT?  I fired off a comment, something along the lines of “Mostly great advice, but I have to disagree with the part about not reading to them.  The American Academy of Pediatrics’ official recommendation is to read to even the youngest children every day, to promote literacy and bonding.”

According to the writer, it’s pointless.  Babies are lumps that aren’t listening to you read, and are only laying still in your arms while you read aloud because they’re immobile and have no choice.  And toddlers are running, screaming maniacs that don’t listen to anything you say or read.  (Well, sometimes that can be true.)  The article’s writer said she gave up when she realized she was sitting in a chair reading aloud to herself while her kids ran shouting up and down the hall outside their rooms.

Well… I mean, kids are all different.  Some kids have more of a tolerance for longer stories than others do.  I’ve certainly done my share of bedtime stories in which I know Peanut isn’t listening to a word I say.  Instead, she’s wiggling, head-butting me (ouch), trying to slap the book away or reciting another story as loud as she can while I read Sweet Dreams, Maisy.  But those are the exception, and I still read through them because it’s important.

Back in the summer of 2014, the American Academy of Pediatrics issued a statement saying that it was the responsibility of pediatric care providers to encourage parents to read to their children from the very beginning of life:

Reading regularly with young children stimulates optimal patterns of brain development and strengthens parent-child relationships at a critical time in child development, which, in turn, builds language, literacy, and social-emotional skills that last a lifetime. Pediatric providers have a unique opportunity to encourage parents to engage in this important and enjoyable activity with their children beginning in infancy.

A news article about the statement further explained:

Children who are read to during infancy and preschool years have better language skills when they start school and are more interested in reading, according to research highlighted in the statement. In addition, parents who spend time reading to their children create nurturing relationships, which is important for a child’s cognitive, language and social-emotional development.

One of the things I like best about Peanut’s pediatrician is that they have taken this message completely to heart, and they make it a priority to encourage parents to read to children of all ages.  Every time Peanut attends a well child visit, her pediatrician gifts her with a book.  (Sometimes she even gets one on a sick visit, which takes some of the sting out of that experience for her.)  Some of her books from the doctor have become her favorite books.

Don’t get me wrong – like I said above, all kids are different.  I happened to get one who will sit quietly in a lap indefinitely if stories are on offer.  (At a parent-teacher conference recently, Peanut’s teacher told us that Peanut would sit in the book corner all day long if they let her; they have to encourage her to put the books down and engage with the other kids.  Color me not surprised.)  And by no means am I trying to imply that Peanut is perfect – like I said, I’ve been head-butted a few times during bedtime stories.  She doesn’t always have the patience for a long book – but we put the book down and either read or do something else when she’s not feeling it, and more often than not she’s the one chasing after me with a book, shouting “Mommy wanna wead dis!  Mommy wanna wead dis!  PLEASE!”

Even when Peanut was a tiny baby, I read to her every day, and I think it mattered.  I know that she didn’t understand what I was talking about when she snuggled in my arms, two months old, as I read Fairacre novels to her aloud during my maternity leave.  But she felt the cuddles and she heard my voice, and I believe that those hours were a foundation on which I built a habit of reading to her that is serving us well now.  And even if I’m wrong about that, our marathon Fairacre-reading sessions when Peanut was two months old are some of my most cherished memories from that time.  (We also read board books and Dr. Seuss and Madeline and more.  Not just Fairacre.  Swear.)

I was debating whether I even wanted to write about this, because it seemed so obvious to me – and I think it will be equally obvious to most of my blog friends – that reading to children, even babies, is not wasted time.  It’s a special bonding experience, it’s the foundation for a lifetime of literacy, and it’s doctor-recommended.  Still, it’s something I’m thinking about.

Nugget is going to be a different kid than Peanut.  He may not have her patience for books (or “book ’ems” as she used to call them – goodness, I miss that).  I hope he does; I hope he loves reading just as much as his sister.  But maybe something else will touch his baby heart more.  Or maybe he’ll be wilder as a toddler and I’ll have to chase him down in order to read to him.  You know what?  If that’s what it takes, that’s what I’ll do.  We’ll try different books.  We’ll try shorter books, if we need to.  (Maybe we won’t need to!  But I do think that Peanut is pretty unusual in her willingness to sit through tomes like The Lorax or One Morning in Maine.)  But we will read together.  Every.  Single.  Day.  No matter what.  And I refuse to believe that it could ever be pointless.  Even when he’s a newborn lump.  Even when he’s a wild toddler.  Reading to children is never pointless.

What’s the worst advice you’ve ever heard/read?