Merry  day after Christmas to all my friends who celebrated yesterday (and may still be celebrating)!  And happy Friday to my friends who were not celebrating this week.  I’m sure that your Feedly overfloweth with sweet and sentimental Christmas messages, and I wish all of that stuff for you, of course.  But rather than toss in a Bible verse or Christmas carol lyric of my own this year, I thought I’d get a little sillier and talk about the phenomenon I think of as Christmas Quibbles.  You know what I mean. I’m not talking about the quibbling that happens at Christmas dinner when Grandpa and Uncle Bootsie just can’t help getting into politics… or when Aunt Tilda slurps the last of the eggnog and you know she don’t need it amirite?  I’m talking about the quibbling that takes place in every merged household, starting at Thanksgiving (or even before) when we all insist that our childhood holiday traditions are the traditions that must survive in the new home.  If you’re married or living with your significant other, odds are you’ve drawn battle lines… and hey, I hear even roommates can get into it.  We’re not immune in my household, and while for us the war is pretty much over, we certainly got into some spirited debates in our first few married Christmases.  Here are the fronts where the Christmas Quibbles war has been fought in my house:

The Real Deal, or Go Faux?

Battle status: concluded
Victory: me

I’m not sure there is any Christmas Quibble more ardently fought than the question of whether to buy a new real tree each year, or pull out a faux every holiday season.  Hubby grew up with a real tree, but my family has been firmly in the faux camp for almost as long as I can remember.  We had a real tree my first few Christmases, but I would get so upset to see it lying out on the street at the end of the Christmas celebrations, and I was still very young when my parents bought their faux tree.  I always thought they did it to shut me up (what can I say, I had some big emotions over seeing that poor dead tree) but now that I’m an adult with a home of my own I think they may have had other reasons, too.  It’s awfully nice to not have to water the tree or vacuum up needles every ding-dong day.  Plus, you can leave the tree out longer and extend the season.  I’ve since heard that you have to keep a faux tree at least seven years for it to be a more environmentally friendly option than a real tree, and we’ve got a few years to go on ours before we hit that point, but my parents have had the same tree for decades, so I’d say their Christmas greenery is pretty darn green.  Hubby and I argued over the real-or-faux question a few times early in our marriage, and I pointed out the environmental, money, and work factors, but I ultimately prevailed with my ironclad argument that it would break my heeeeeeeeeeeart to see the tree lying in the streeeeeeeeeet.

Christmas Lights: A Heavy Question

Battle status: temporary ceasefire
Victory: me (for now)

Another area where hubby and I differ: the twinkle lights.  His family has always used (and still uses to this day) colored lights.  My parents go for white lights.  Once again, we each prefer our own family’s approach to the light question.  This isn’t a reasoned debate where I can point out all the conveniences of white lights over multi-colored.  It’s a deeply ingrained preference on both sides that simply cannot be argued away.  Hubby likes the look of multi-colored lights.  It reminds him of his childhood and he finds it more festive.  I like white lights.  It’s a cleaner look that allows the ornaments and greenery to shine and while I can certainly appreciate that the muti-colored approach is popular, it’s just not for me.  It’s just not.  And I will never change my mind on this point. Our current tree is pre-strung with white lights, and we’re hoping to keep the tree a long time, so you’d think the debate was settled.  I have considered the battle over for years… but lately hubby seems inclined to reopen hostilities.  Just the other day I heard him telling Peanut, “When Daddy was a little boy we had colored lights on our tree, sooooooooooo pretty.”  (That’s fighting dirty, by the way – trying to convert the two-year-old to your side.)  He may have underestimated just how entrenched I am in my position, and just how not afraid to pull circuit breakers I might turn out to be.

To Josh or Not To Josh

Battle Status: ongoing
Victory: too soon to tell

Please tell me that someone else argues with their significant other over Christmas music.  Please.  This is the one area where the battle still rages in my house, because it’s not like a CD is a big investment that we plan to keep for years.  Here’s the situation: I love Josh Groban.  I would listen to him sing names out of a phone book.  Hubby, for some reason, can’t stand him.  (He hates most of my CDs, which he derisively calls “college music,” whatever that means.)  So we argue about this every year when the time comes to put on Christmas music.  Hubby will whip out his phone, with the Christmas Traditional station loaded on Pandora.  I will wave my copy of Josh’s “Noel” over my head like a crazy lady. And apparently the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.  When we hosted our tree-trimming party this year, hubby and his dad engaged in some of the most spirited and creative Josh-bashing I have ever heard.  I tuned into the conversation just in time to hear one of them say, with heavy scorn, “And he obviously never sang treble in an Episcopal choir.”  LOLwut?  (By the way, hubby, I’m pretty sure the lead “singer” of Rammstein also never sang treble in an Episcopal choir.  Just a hunch.)  It’s worth noting that my sister-in-law Emma, who did sing in an Episcopal choir for many years, is firmly pro-Josh.  It probably helps that he’s nice to look at. Anyway, I thought I had hit on the perfect strategy: limit the Christmas music options to Josh, Sarah McLachlan or the Mormon Tabernacle Choir.  But Christmas Traditional Pandora was a big blow to my battle plans.  (The joke’s on hubby though… maybe… the other day I heard Josh on Christmas Traditional Pandora.  Check.  Mate.)  Anyway, we’ve ultimately landed in a stalemate.  I agitate for Josh constantly, and hubby occasionally relents.  The rest of the time, I listen to Josh in my car.  I get my daily Josh fix during the season, and hubby mostly avoids him.  Meanwhile, I am eagerly trying to recruit Peanut to the pro-Josh camp.  (That’s right.  I can fight dirty, too.)

I know you have Christmas Quibbles in your house, too, so spill.  Where are the battle lines drawn in your family?